so recently i stumbled upon this article How Learning To Cross-Country Ski With My Partner Brought Us Closer Together where the author talks about skiing with her partner, and how that strengthened their bond. What really stood out to me in this article tho, is the author was talking about how this big skiing trip they planned for weeks in advance wasn’t going to plan. It was overcast, cloudy, fingers-about-to-fall-off-freezing, and expensive. She said:
“But, all I felt was pressure to enjoy something—and guilt that I just…wasn’t.”
wow! same girl, literally, same.
my partner and i keep planning on visiting MoMA. We’re both museum lovers, and it’s one of the best perks about living in nyc. We’ve visited MoMA a couple times in the past year, so i knew what to expect. and really, the experience is kinda lame.
here’s another article about it: Meet ‘Enjoyment Anxiety,’ the Reason You Feel Pressured to Have the Best. Time. Ever. in the article, this author quotes psychotherapist Spiedh Saremi, LCSW, who says
"Think about the weekend. It's like, 'I only have these two days, and I really better make these them count, because it’s nonstop during the week.'"
this ‘weekend’ pressure becomes too much, and i end up becoming frozen in place - frozen by the great expectation to have the best experience, to be in the best mood, and frozen by the abundance of things to do when the weekend comes - which is the exact right thing to do now that I have two days off from work?
there’s always so many ppl at MoMA. yea, yea, i get it, “it’s nyc”, there’s always a lot of ppl. but like, it’s always busy at MoMA. i guess if i took a day off from work during the week and visited between the hours of 10am-5pm it wouldn’t be as busy. but still, it takes a lot of energy to navigate the unfamiliar territory of the place (which floor is Lichtenstein? where’s the bathroom? should i go left or right upon entering this gallery?) all while focusing on the deluge of pedestrian traffic. also basically you just wait in line to see any painting in any gallery, not just Van Gogh. It’s just.. a lot. do I really want to go through all that? not really.
Museums are supposed to be a peaceful experience, but this experience isn’t very peaceful for me. HOWEVER, i still feel pressured, like i should want to do this! like, this is part of my personality - i go to museums. i’m a museum person. but actually i really don’t want to go to a museum.
we never ended up going to MoMA. and that’s fine by me.